Tag Archives: mental health

Celebrating a Big One

I recently celebrated my 65th birthday. For those who haven’t yet entered the AARP years, 65 is a pretty significant number.

At age 65 (or 3 months before), most people become eligible for Medicare. But let me assure you, the organizations that sell supplemental insurance have been tracking you for years. You will begin receiving ads and official-looking letters not long into your 60s. Get a bigger recycle bin. You’ll need it.

It used to be that 65 was “the retirement year.” Not so much anymore. I won’t be retiring anytime soon, as I didn’t bother to put anything into retirement savings until I could afford to, which was well into my 50s. So I’ll be working until I’m about 86.

For those of you who are turning 40 and whining about needing glasses or that extra 10 pounds that just won’t come off…get ready for a heavy dose of reality at 65. Not only are your glasses tri-focal, but cataracts and floaters make your vision like you’re looking up through murky water.

And that extra 10 pounds becomes 40 pounds if you didn’t make some changes in your lifestyle back in your 40s and 50s. Most of us in our mid-to-late-60s have some chronic condition like hypertension, high cholesterol, diabetes, or some type of cardiovascular issue. And many of my friends sport at least one “replacement” part. Thankfully I received some great advice in my early 50s, and I have good health today, but it can all change with one slip sideways off the curb.

Take some advice from someone who is definitely older, maybe a bit wiser…

Get off your butt. Start moving while you still can. Lose a few pounds if you need to. Eat healthier. Say “no” to desserts once in a while. Choose fish or chicken when you can. Drink more water. Drink less alcohol. Don’t smoke. For God’s sake, don’t smoke.

Put down your phone and spend intentional time with your friends and family. Read good books. Spend time in nature. Meet your neighbors. Volunteer at the food pantry or homeless shelter or pass out meals at the Salvation Army. Play games with your kids (or grandkids). Start a new hobby. Get rid of the junk in your basement.

Travel now and don’t put off that big trip you want to take “someday.” Someday never comes, and then, at 65, you’re looking in the rearview mirror at all the fun trips you wish you’d done.

As I’ve aged, I’ve realized the need to learn new ways to remember things. I know I don’t have any significant cognitive decline, but I’m not too proud to admit that I can be forgetful at times. So I’ve learned ways to cope. I make lists of what I want from the grocery store. I take pictures of the new bathroom vanity I want. I write down my computer passwords. I take the card my hair stylist and chiropractor offer me that tells me when my next appointment is. I won’t lie to myself and say, “I’ll remember that,” because I won’t. Halfway to my car, I’ve already forgotten.

There is much to enjoy about this new season. I’ve become less concerned about what others think. No worries about growing out my gray hair since I did that in my 40s. I say “yes” more often for things I want to do and “no” when my social currency is spent. I wear more pink (my granddaughter’s favorite color). I continue to learn new things every day so I can be hip and cool into my 80s.

I’m grateful for every morning, spending my first hour in Scripture. I’m grateful for every evening as I lie down next to my sweet husband. I’m thankful for walking and running. Sleeping and waking. Working and playing. Growing and flourishing. Ok, 65, here we go!

Celebrating with my granddaughter

Don’t be the Bench, Don’t be the Pigeons

I posted a picture online yesterday of a bench located a short walk from my downtown office. I always take walks over my lunch hour and yesterday, seeing this bench stopped me cold.

94750011-12de-4ecd-96cd-bca4bb706b87It doesn’t take much imagination to tell what’s going on here. There is a small tree that overhangs the bench, and it seems to be a popular spot for birds to “do their business.” The bench is right outside an apartment building, but I’m assuming not many people choose to sit there. Not before the bombardment of bird poo, and certainly not after.

But seeing that bench also made me think of toxic relationships, and how sometimes we are “bombarded by poo” from people who think they can just sit there and spew at us, and that we have to take it. Don’t be the bench. If you have someone (or more than one) in your life who delights in dumping on you all the time, choose to walk away. Take yourself out of that situation. You’ll feel cleaner, free from someone else’s need to release their noxious stuff all over. When you step away, you’ll receive much needed relief, and the possibility of a relationship reset down the road.

(I am not a professional counselor. If this is a relationship you are committed to, such as a marriage or family one, please seek professional counseling to deal with the issues causing this toxicity. This is not my endorsement for leaving a marriage.)

Also – don’t be the pigeons. Don’t just mindlessly release your issues wherever you happen to land. Be careful with your relationships, personal and professional. You may be angry, frustrated, or overwhelmed, but the people around you don’t deserve to have your stuff flung their way. If necessary, get professional help to deal with whatever’s destroying your ability to handle stress.

So, my tidbit of wisdom for today: Toxic relationships will affect your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Don’t be the bench and certainly, don’t be the pigeon.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. The law is not against such things.” Galatians 5:22-23 (CSB)

A New Way to Lose Weight

Laughter cropped

It’s mid-February and it feels like winter will never end. I can feel my stress levels rising and my temper closer to the surface. It takes less to make me upset so I eat comfort food everyday, which means more stress every time I step on a scale. I’m spending more brain power thinking of ways to cope with no sun or warmth. I’m sick of sweaters and leggings and fuzzy socks and boots. I’m in serious need of a vacation and my bank account says, “not anytime soon, sister!” So I’ve hit upon a solution (at least until I can see the sun again)…

Laugh! I’m going to try to laugh every day. If the normal life situations don’t give me enough belly busters, then I’ll go looking for some. Joke books, movies, old TV shows – there’s a plethora of resources for giggles. And if the comedians who make their living making us laugh can’t get it done, I can always turn to the internet. Facebook is rife with stories (true or not) of people who’ve done some pretty dumb things – always good for a chuckle or two.

I can’t get outside to run because I’m afraid of ice and snow and falling. So I’ll go with this  Norman Cousins quote for now: “Hearty laughter is a good way to jog internally without having to go outdoors.” Wonder how much laughter it would take to offset a chocolate truffle?

Seriously (really? in a blog about laughing) – I know that laughter has more positive effects than just a quick dose of humor in my day. In an article from Health Guidance for Better Health, Mack LeMouse says “humor and  laughing are infectious and can bring people together and make them forget their troubles.” It’s one way to maintain a positive attitude and good health.

So if you’re feeling the winter blues today, pick up a joke book, or check out Netflix for comedies or search the internet for Red Skelton or Jimmy Fallon You Tube videos. Boost your mental health with a good belly laugh today.