Author Archives: Kris McGarvey

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About Kris McGarvey

It's not what I do that matters...it's who I am through the eyes of Jesus.

I’m Not Like You and That’s Okay

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I spent this afternoon in the company of a wonderful group of my heroes. Everyone left their capes home for the day but I recognized them anyway. They’re moms. Not just ordinary moms…but extraordinary moms. They have chosen to sacrifice paying jobs, adult conversation, daily affirmation and bathrooms cleaned by someone else so they can teach their children math, reading, geography, science, love, acceptance, loyalty, honor, exploration, patriotism…They home school their children every day. They don’t love their kids more than you do. But they have made the decision to educate their own children and it isn’t an easy one. There are no medals at the end of their day for finishing the race. They are not better parents because they home school but they have chosen a difficult, and sometimes frustrating path. I’m a home schooling mom alum and I know that what they do is often unseen and unappreciated. They probably don’t hear the accolades they deserve. Their rewards are usually big hugs and sticky kisses. Which, now that I think about it, is a pretty wonderful pay check. Thank you for allowing me to relive a few memories and make some new friends.

On to my daily dose of “giving up.”

Day 4 – Give up Comparisons

When I first started running (11 months ago), I found it tempting to look at the Facebook posts of my friends who are runners. One young friend ran every day and posted the most amazing (to me) times and distances. I would get discouraged a bit comparing my pathetic times with hers. Another guy would post something like – “Took a quick 5 mile run after dinner. Not as fast as usual, but ok.” He would show a picture of his Garmin display with a 9 minute/mile pace. Seriously? Not as fast as usual? Who does he think he is – the Roadrunner? I was struggling to finish 2 miles at 11 minutes/mile and felt pretty good about it…until then.

My second 5K run last summer was a timed race and I stood at the back of the group at the finish to review the results. I was floored by how much everyone compared themselves to each other. By this time I had learned it was silly for me to compare myself to anyone else when it came to running. I was getting out there, I was meeting my goals and I was happy with my results. Comparing my results to any other runner wasn’t going to help me get better or faster. It would only be a source of discouragement and frustration.

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I learned the “no comparison” lesson with running but it’s a never ending battle in other areas of my life. I still find myself looking at others in regards to my weight, my parenting, my choices, my teaching style, my prayer life, yada, yada, yada. Probably have some deep psychological issues of insecurity but those can wait for another post.

My point is comparing ourselves to others can only be debilitating. You’ll either judge yourself lacking compared to someone else’s success or you’ll determine you’re better than everyone else and become judgmental. Either end of the spectrum is faulty and damaging. My goal isn’t to judge myself worse or better than you…but to encourage you, build you up. Praise your successes – pray for you during your struggles – come alongside you in the good and not-so-good times.

So today I’m definitely making the decision to stop comparing myself to anyone else. I’m not going to use your accomplishments or your efforts as barometers for my own. I’m the best ME I can be and how you live and make choices doesn’t affect that fact. And the same goes for you.

Say this out loud to yourself.

I’m. The. Best. Me. Ever.

Now get out there and be amazing!

So You Think You’re Not Good Enough?

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Day Three – Packing Up My Feelings of Unworthiness

I have to admit I have a pretty healthy self-image. I don’t really struggle with feeling unworthy of love. But I know a lot of people who do – women and men. Maybe it’s because I received a lot of affirmation as a child and even now as a middle-aged adult (Hey – I’m going to live to be 110, ok?). My parents always told me they loved me, they hugged and kissed us as kids (and adults). My dad constantly told me I could do anything I put my mind to. I receive a lot of encouragement from my husband, friends and employers. They seem to have faith and trust in me, and I try to show the same to others in my circle of influence.

But maybe you don’t have that support. Why do some of us feel unworthy of love and acceptance? Maybe you didn’t have anyone show you love or tell you in ways you understood (see “Five Love Languages” by Dr. Gary Chapman). Maybe we’ve judged ourselves unworthy because of what we see on the outside, using cultural standards of beauty. We buy into a false reality when we believe what the magazine covers and cosmetic ads tell us about beauty. If we believe the romance novels and the movie plot lines, we would never feel “good enough” to be worthy of anything.

In case you don’t realize it – Your identity comes from what God has done for you and He says you are worthy. Here are a few things you need to remind yourself of…and saying them out loud helps a lot!

*I am accepted.
*I am secure.
*I am significant.
*I have value.
*I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
*I have been chosen by God.
*I am God’s friend.
*I have been bought with a price and I belong to God.
*I have direct access to the throne of grace through Jesus.
*I am born of God.
*I have been given a spirit of power, love and a sound mind.
*I am God’s workmanship.
*I am a citizen of heaven.
*I have been established, anointed and sealed by God.
*I am being transformed into Jesus’ likeness.

This whole list is in Scripture so if you want the exact references, let me know. There’s a whole bunch more too!

So – remember this. Your identity, your feelings of worth, do not come from your name, your heritage, your circumstances, your children, your job, your talents (or lack), your address, or what people say about you. God says your beauty comes not from your outward appearance but from your inner self, “the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” (1 Peter 3:4)

Oh boy – I really need to work on that gentle and quiet thing.

But That Makes Me Uncomfortable

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The Lenten season has just begun and I’m blogging about all those things I’m going to give up. By the end of this 40 Day journey, I may be skinnier. Yay.

Day Two – Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone

I don’t know about you but I like to be comfortable. When I get home from work I often change right into fleece lounge pants and a sweatshirt. Very attractive, let me tell you. The combination of the fabric and the looseness just makes me feel so good…so comfortable. And when I’m grumpy, or cold, or anxious, or sad, there’s nothing like my mom’s homemade chicken and noodles…or big piece of lasagna…or greasy cheeseburger…or deep dish pizza. Comfort food .

But today I’m going to give up my comfort zone. I’m going to get outside the fleece-lined box I like to crawl into to avoid change or escape the world and its worries. I’ll drink tea instead of coffee. I’ll eat a salad instead of a slice of pizza. I’ll choose prayer over worry. I’ll make a new friend instead of the safety of those I already know. I’ll change up my routine, just because.

Change is a necessary component of life. Probably the only time I’ve chosen to embrace it is when I’m the one controlling it. The Bible is full of accounts when change happens and how we can deal with it. God asks Abram to change locations, many times. Abram didn’t argue, he just went, even when he didn’t know where he was going. I want that attitude. “It’s not about me, Lord. Wherever you send me, I’ll go!”

How about changing a name? God changes Abram to Abraham and Sarai to Sarah. Pharoah changes Joseph’s name to Zaphenath-paneah (just try to find a necklace with that one on it). Usually with these new names, came new promises. My Lord – who knows me by name – calls me blessed, chosen and loved. Good name.

In Gen. 15 God appears to Abram in a vision (how’s that for outside your comfort zone?). God is once again reassuring Abram that he will have a son of his own flesh. I especially like this part in verse 5: God took Abram outside of his tent (where he was warm and comfortable) and said, “Look up at the sky and count the stars…if indeed you can count them.” God showed Abram how big His vision was – more offspring than the stars in the sky. Allow God to take you outside your comfortable tent and show you the BIG dream, the BIG vision He has for you. But you’ll never see it from the comfort of your tent. You’ve got to step outside!

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Maybe God will ask you to move, or change your job, or look up an old friend, or make a new one, or try a different food, or take a missions trip, or pray with the clerk at Wal-Mart. How about this one? God may ask you to stand up for your faith when no one around you is doing so. Are you comfortable with that? Are you going to give up your comfort zone? I’m going to try. And that’s all God asks.

Forty Days of Giving Up

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I’ve never given up anything for Lent. At least, nothing I seriously desired. Like chocolate. Or coffee. Or pizza. Honestly, those things don’t really have much impact on my life. Giving them up for 40 days isn’t really a hardship. Maybe I should consider giving up a few things that are really holding me back from becoming the woman God desires me to be. ..not just for Lent but for a lifetime. For the next 40 days, I’m going to try to highlight one thing most any of us could give up and live a more epic life!

Day One – Let’s bag up our fear of failure and pitch it!

Anyone who truly faces life head on fears failing at the tasks set before us. But failure happens to all of us. I didn’t learn to walk the very first time I tried. I didn’t get an A on every test, in every subject. I didn’t keep every friend I ever had. I’ve messed up as a wife, mom, friend, leader, employee…and any other role I’ve ever had. Face it – failure is inevitable.

Thankfully, God only uses failures like me. The Bible is full of imperfect people. Men and women who have tried and failed and tried again. The very first man and woman, Adam & Eve, failed at one little thing. Don’t eat from that tree. Epic fail. Moses killed an Egyptian, ran away to live in the desert and questioned God a bunch of times. He let his anger get the best of him sometimes (but really, who wouldn’t with that group?). David. Great writer, pretty decent shepherd but husband and father? Not too good. He can put “adulterer and murderer” on his resume and yet God calls him a “friend of God.” Peter – big mouth, no boundaries, denied Christ 3 times. Goes on to headline Day of Pentecost and opens the door for Gentiles to hear about Jesus. Paul – starts out as killer of Christ-followers, but ends as winner of Best Apostle in the Action/Adventure category. The list goes on and on.

I’m a sports nerd so I’ll use it as an illustration. Any baseball player who hits .400 is considered exceptional. But that’s a guy who misses the ball 6 out of 10 times. No one makes every shot they try or every pass they throw. Probably the best basketball player on the planet, Michael Jordan, once said, “I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life…that’s why I succeed.”

So for the first day of Lent, cut yourself some slack. Let go of your fear of failure and instead, learn and grow from those mistakes. No more excuses. Consider yourself like a toddler learning to walk. When you fall down, sit for a second, blink a couple of times, lean forward, put your hands on the ground, stick your bum in the air, and get back up again!

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Who Am I?

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I was recently asked to be the speaker at an upcoming homeschooling moms’ getaway. Truly humbled and honored, I’ve been attempting to come up with a bio the organizers could use for their brochure. Something short and pithy – humorous but elaborate. Something that would make someone want to come hear me. I got nothing.

Then I decided to try some free writing – not worrying about length or breadth or scope or humor or grammar and punctuation. It’s way too long for their purposes but hey – that’s what blogging is for, right? To give anybody an opportunity to write, knowing it probably won’t be read anyway.

Kris McGarvey – Who Am I?

I’m a former homeschooling mom and currently helping my husband as the president of WFM Missions Base in Robins.

I love trying new restaurants, reading stuff, experimenting with new tastes & recipes, learning how to run, walking for great coffee, setting new goals and then pushing past my self-imposed limitations, endeavoring to avoid saying “I can’t” until I’ve at least tried, travelling outside my comfortability (and making up words that my spell-checker doesn’t appreciate…like comfortability).

I’m loving the journey, embracing my own adventures, not particularly a lover of danger but thrilled with discovering the hidden treasures of life like small consignment stores, coffee shops and people’s stories.

I’m an amateur writer but a professional list-maker. I love shoes and the color purple (not the book, never read it). I say I’m silver-haired (because grey-haired sounds too old). I’m a novice runner but an elite chocolate and coffee consumer. I love lots of genres of music (and I really like the word “genre”) – hymns, worship, jazz, folk, singer-songwriter stuff and catchy pop tunes like “Happy.” I’ve never seen the movie “Frozen” and don’t know any of the lyrics to “Let It Go” and I’m okay with that. I enjoy a good guitar or piano solo but I’m learning the nuances of a really great drummer. I love the band NEEDTOBREATHE and don’t mind it when people call me a “groupie.” My kids don’t because I take them to concerts with me. They are not dumb.

I’ve embraced social media for the platform it gives me to stay connected to family and friends around the world and to encourage those who need someone on their side, someone who can say with confidence – “Trust Him – this too shall pass.”

I’m a sports junkie. If it gets played with a ball, I probably like it. Even curling and it’s played with a rock. I watch golf tournaments on TV with my family like others do the Super Bowl (snacks and everything). Though my 3 guys and I split up our loyalties to cheer for different teams (Hawks, Illini, Cubs, Cardinals, Rams, Falcons, Bears, Lakers, Nets, Bulls) – we do agree on one thing – we think Zach Johnson is awesome. I do live to see the Cubs in the World Series, so I may be immortal, not sure.

I love superheroes…they really exist and I’m pretty sure I’m married to one. I try to be a good sidekick to my phenomenally intelligent husband and I appreciate that he keeps me around to take care of those mundane things like computers, phones, taxes, and cleaning the bathroom (though I’m not very good with that last one).

I’m privileged to have birthed two sons – both of which are so much like their parents that they scare me, and yet so different from each other. They each amaze me with their maturity, wisdom, sense of humor and discernment, despite their upbringing. They are gifted with creativity, although it usually plays out in different areas. They both love fiercely and I’m proud to be on the receiving end of it.

I’m not perfect and I’m not trying to be. I’ve decided that life is too much fun and there’s just so much to do, that I can’t allow others’ expectations to rob me of my joy in discovery.

Most of all, I’m a lover of Jesus. He gives me life and breath and joy and unconditional love and grace and mercy. He picks me up when circumstances pull me under. He laughs with me and listens to me and holds me. He dries my tears and grins at my attempts at humor. He whispers to me in the night and shows me great and mighty things. He says he’ll be with me through anything, so I know I can be brave and try, because I won’t be alone. He tells me to “dream big” and then takes me outside my comfortability and shows me the stars in an endless sky. Most of the time He just blows me away.

What is the difference between living and existing?

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Existing = breathing, eating, sleeping, drinking water. Operating with a bare minimum of effort in order to keep yourself from death.

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Living = All of the above on steroids PLUS:

Embracing life head on.

Choosing risk and change over ruts and routine.

Giving more than taking.

Trusting your heart to someone.

Risking more than playing safe.

Running forward more than stepping back.

Changing more than being complacent.

Knowing you are only one breath from death so committing to breathe deeply.

Loving people and using things, not the other way around.

Courage in place of fear.

Listening at least twice as much as speaking.

Authenticity, not fake “How are you’s”.

Thanksgiving in a world of complaints and whining.

Forgiving over harboring hurts and grudges.

Allowing love over suffering indifference.

Laughter over silence.

Dancing over standing still.

Learning something new each day – and then passing it on to someone else.

Lifting your face into the wind, accepting with laughter and enthusiasm all that life throws your way.

Too many people only exist. How sad.

Seize life!

There’s an app for that!

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Staying healthy and fit is a lot easier than it used to be. When I was younger the options for where to run for exercise were running on the road and…ok, that was it…running on the road. Nowadays there are all types of trails – paved, crushed rock, wood chips – in varying widths and lengths – plus treadmills with all sorts of bells and whistles. You can basically hook yourself up and get a full medical breakdown while you listen to tunes or watch an episode of Dr. Phil. They even have treadmills at our local public library so I can read and walk without getting hit by a car or tripping off the curb. Yes – I’ve done that. No – not read and walk…just trip off the curb.

But now I’m the clueless owner of a smartphone and I have the power of genius literally at my fingertips. Want to train for a 5K? There’s an app for that! Want to find out how many steps you’ve taken in a day or get a reminder to drink more water? There’s an app for that too!  I even have an app for daily workout routines with videos and countdowns so I can follow along. I love this techie stuff!

There are few great apps for getting spiritually fit too. I just downloaded a prayer app to help me remember to pray for specific requests or post my own request for others to pray.  I know my busy life needs reminders now and again.

Now I can watch church services on my phone, Kindle or computer any time, day or night. There’s an app for that! It’s called Sermon.net and it allows a listener, free of charge, to access an archive of sermons, teachings and live broadcasts.

There are even apps for motivation and encouragement.

But, my very favorite app allows me to read the Word, in just about any version, right from my phone. YouVersion is a free Bible app that I have downloaded to my phone and my Kindle. There are no ads (which is unusual for free apps) and has tons of features like Bible reading plans, devotionals, and even suggestions for sermon topics. You can highlight verses and then virtually share with your friends, via Twitter, Facebook or email. You can create notes or bookmark a passage for later study. You can read it or have it read to you. KJV, NIV, NASB plus hundreds of other versions…in English, French, Spanish or Abau, Batak Karo, Chorti, or Gofa. (In case you’re wondering, those are 4 of the hundreds of languages available).

Commercial over. BTW – all the apps I’ve mentioned are free and available through the iTunes app store. Okay – commercial is really over now.

Closing thought: we have no more excuses. No more reasons to say we can’t pray, can’t read the Bible, can’t get healthy. The tools are available – we just have to pick one up and use it.

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Choosing to Get Fit

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Recently I’ve been focusing on getting physically fit and healthy. I’m not getting any younger and if it’s within my own choosing, I want to be healthy for my children’s adulthood and potential grandchildren.

My iPhone has opened doors to be fit with apps which allow me to measure my steps and my workouts. It even gives me cardio training suggestions. I have a goal to actually run a 5K this summer so I have an app that gives me a training plan. It even talks to me through the whole thing. Genius.

But with all my energy on getting my physical body in shape, I’ve let my spiritual man become a couch potato. Relaxing in the successes of the past doesn’t keep those spiritual muscles in shape so when a crisis hits, I’ll be huffing and puffing to keep up or worse yet, fail to even try and allow the enemy to steal my joy, my relationships and my strength.

So for the next few blogs I’m going to outline a few exercises you can do to get spiritually fit and healthy. And just like all fitness motivators will tell you – it won’t be easy but you’ve got to push through the pain to get the victory. Unlike your physical body, which will eventually give out no matter how healthy you are, your spirit stays with you forever.

My focus is not on gaining additional favor with God, to somehow look better in His eyes. He will not love me less because of my perceived failures. He adores me! And you too! You are choosing to get spiritually strong for your own self…because you’ll be able to step into the destiny God has for you with confidence.

Take a few minutes right now to open God’s Word and get a spiritual lift from reading a Psalm or two. The Holy Spirit is your personal trainer in this journey you’re on – use Him to teach, train and guide you to be a strong and healthy believer! Read Isaiah 41 and be encouraged.

Isaiah 41:9-10 – “I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I called you. I said, ‘You are my servant’: I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Today’s motivation: Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try.

Legacy of Hate – Power of Love

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Two well-known evangelists died within the last two weeks.

Both evangelized the world with their beliefs. One was known for loving and sacrificing everything to tell all about the love of Jesus. The other was known for spewing hate and rhetoric about the judgment and wrath of his god. Steve Hill taught us to love all people, regardless of background or lifestyle. Fred Phelps taught us to hate everyone who doesn’t look or act like him.

It’s sad that the hater is going to get more press than the lover but the squeaky wheel always gets the attention. Rev. Phelps and his family comprise the Westboro Baptist Church. They are well known for picketing funerals of war veterans, and a variety of other venues – anywhere they can scream and spew and spit (on camera, of course). They hold up nasty signs and shake their fists at the world. I’m not going to get into details because the internet is full of articles in case you’ve been living under a rock for the last few years.

My last blog post was about the effect Steve Hill’s “yes” to God had upon my family and the world. What about Fred Phelps? Did he truly believe he was saying “yes” to a mandate from God? Probably. But that is not the God I know and love, the God who loves me and everyone else in the world. Rev. Phelps gave the words Christian, Baptist and church a really bad name. The media will make much of his legacy of hate but now he’s gone and we’re still here. We can choose to truly be God’s hands, and feet, and voice of love.  My God sent His only Son because He loves all of us. That’s a message too long stomped upon by the Fred Phelps’ of this world. It’s time I stepped up – time I was brave in the face of adversity and showed the authentic love of Christ…even to those who don’t look like me, act like me, or even like me. We’ve got a lot of lies about God to overcome – not by words, or signs, or social media – but by demonstrating the sacrificial love of Jesus. Steve Hill gave us an amazing example. Here’s to another “yes, God.”

The Life of One Man

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SteveHill-50percentLast Sunday morning heaven welcomed one of the most dedicated and faithful servants I have known. Evangelist Steve Hill battled cancer for the last few years but throughout the struggle, he and his lovely wife Jeri stayed strong in their faith, continuing to serve God through their ministry, in the U.S. and around the world. There are plenty of websites and blogs you can read to give you more details about Steve’s battle and his life.

I’ve been thinking a lot this week about “what if?” What if Steve Hill had not said “yes” to the direction God had for him? How would my life have been different?

Steve’s “Yes, Lord” changed the way I live, love and serve. Think for a minute. My Facebook timeline would look a whole lot different since most of my FB friends have also been impacted by this one man’s ministry. I probably wouldn’t even have some of you as friends or acquaintances. My family was totally changed because of the Brownsville Revival in the late 1990s. Many of you know of my husband’s dramatic encounter with the power of the Holy Spirit in the altars of Brownsville Assembly of God. All of the pastoral staff from our church had travelled to witness the revival firsthand. All came back changed, renewed, revived, transformed and anointed.

The power of the Holy Spirit was poured out in our own church with many people travelling from great distances to witness this outpouring of power and repentance. My whole family, including my 2-yr-old and 4-year-old sons, experienced services which lasted late into the night, witnessed people laid out across our sanctuary, learned new worship choruses which expressed heartfelt yearning to touch the heart of God. “Enemy’s Camp” and “We Will Ride” are now worship classics, straight from the keyboard of Lindell Cooley into sanctuary platforms everywhere. Prayer teams prayed over people for hours as desperate men and women, pastors and wives, ministry leaders and laypeople, believers and non-believers urgently sought a touch from God.

This little outpouring continued for years. We had training for pastors on Friday afternoons followed by Friday Night Alive services. The chairs of our sanctuary were littered with Bibles, handouts and even shoes as people saved seats from Sunday morning to Sunday night. This transformation of the body of Christ went far beyond Pensacola and Cedar Rapids. There are few people who haven’t heard of the Brownsville Revival or its evangelist, pastor, worship leader, or youth leader. These men, and subsequently those they touched, have impacted the Body of Christ around the world.

Personally? My children grew up believing revival is “normal.” As 20-somethings, they know a church service without the power of the Holy Spirit is just a gathering, not an empowering. Those worship choruses are still beloved in our household – they bring back great memories but also spur us not to settle for cute phrases or catchy tunes. Nothing but touching the heart of God will do. I have friends around the world because I took groups of women to Brownsville for women’s conferences. Women like Dotty Schmitt, Brenda Kilpatrick and Varle Rollins are priceless mentors to me because Steve Hill said “yes, Lord.” I’m no longer satisfied with the way church used to run, the way I used to live, the concept of God I used to have. This little blog couldn’t possibly touch the many ways life as I knew it changed in the spring of 1996.

All of this because Steve Hill said “yes” to God on Father’s Day 1995 in Pensacola, Florida. Now – take a look at your own legacy. Have you said “yes” to God’s plans for you? Maybe you don’t think it really matters in the whole scheme of the universe. I’m glad Steve Hill thought differently.